We continue with Part IV in our series of reflections on the Song of Songs based on John Paul II’s theology of the body (TOB). This time we will look at the lover’s expression, “A garden locked is my sister, my bride, a garden closed, a fountain sealed” (4:12).

Before I present some of John Paul’s ideas, I should alert you that – like many other mystics who have commented on the Song of Songs – John Paul’s intimate reflections may scandalize some. But such “scandal” only points to how deeply we are in need of reclaiming the holiness of sexuality. That’s the precise goal of John Paul II’s TOB. It is certainly not to titillate, but to sublimate – to show how sublime, how holy the union of husband and wife truly is.

John Paul first comments on the importance of the lover calling his beloved “sister” before calling her “bride.” This demonstrates that the lover respects her as a person who shares the same humanity. It demonstrates that his desire for her as “bride” is not one of lust but of love.

The normal man recoils at the idea of lusting after his sister – and so should a man recoil at the thought of lusting after his bride. Marriage, after all, does not justify a man using his wife as an object for his pleasure. Marital intercourse is meant to express divine love, not base animal instinct. It’s precisely the lover’s recognition of his wife as “sister” that allows him to approach her with selfless tenderness (see TOB 110:2).

The groom demonstrates the genuine character of his love all the more with the expressions “garden closed” and “fountain sealed.” These indicate, as John Paul II poignantly observes, that the “bride presents herself to the eyes of the man as the master of her own mystery” (TOB 110:7). The groom must respect the fact that he cannot dominate or control his bride. She is in control of her own person; she is master of her own “mystery.”

The point is that authentic love affords a certain “entering” into the mystery of the other person without ever violating the person (see TOB 111:1). If a person’s “love” violates the one loved, then it is not love and should not be called love. It is love’s counterfeit – lust. If the lover is to enter this “garden” and participate in the woman’s mystery, he cannot barge in or break down the door. Nor can he manipulate her into surrendering the key. If he is to respect his beloved as “master of her own mystery,” all the lover can do is “knock at the door” and respectfully await her response.

The lover in the Song initiates the gift, making his desire clear: “Open to me, my sister, my love” (5:2). And she hears him: “Listen, my beloved is knocking” (5:2). But he puts “his hand to the latch” (5:4) only with her freely given “yes” – given without any hint of being coerced or manipulated. In total freedom, she surrenders to him; she opens her garden to him, making it his: “Awake, O north wind, and come, O south wind! Blow upon my garden, let its fragrance be wafted abroad. Let my beloved come to his garden, and eat its choicest fruits” (4:16).

Thus, as John Paul II observes, in the course of their dialogue, “the ‘garden closed’ opens up in some way before the eyes of the bridegroom’s soul and body” (TOB 111:4). And with profound reverence, he beholds her mystery unveiled. He comes to her delighting in her gift, remaining ever in awe of her freely opened mystery: “I come to my garden, my sister, my bride, I gather my myrrh with my spice, I eat my honeycomb with my honey, I drink my wine with my milk” (5:1).

In response to those who consider this erotic poetry “profane,” we must recall that this is God’s word. As John Paul says, the Song of Songs reveals an “essential sign of holiness” (TOB 109:2). Lord, please teach us the true meaning of holiness! Please restore in our hearts your true plan for the love of man and woman. Amen.